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just starting out?

If you just found out that your child needs glasses, and you’re looking for some information and reassurance, you may want to take a look at our post on just starting out.

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54 responses to “Archives”

  1. Pingback: 100! « little four eyes·

  2. My son is 4 and we had no idea he has any problem with his vision. He was tested at school and we recvd a letter suggesting we have further testing. Well we did and were shocked with the news that he was near-sighted and dbl stig. Stunned I demanded a second opn and was told pretty much the same thing. However the Dr said we should gradually increase the lenses. We got his first pair today and he says he sees dbl and doesnt want to keep them on…. what do we do?

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  3. I would definitely call the PO or opthamologist that prescribed these lenses. I am not an expert on this, but generally when our children see double, it’s because they cross their eyes in order to compensate for poor vision. If he is nearsighted, the glasses should really make a difference in his vision. Maybe he needs to have the prescription that he really needs rather than a gradual increase in the lenses. I have not heard that they do that for nearsightedness. I can tell you from my own experience that if he has an astigmatism that has never been corrected it takes some time to get used to the glasses. I remember feeling like the ground was uneven when I first got my glasses. Maybe getting him to keep them on consistently for a couple of days and seeing if it gets better is a solution? Hang in there. The first few weeks are the hardest as there is so much to take in! Once he gets used to his glasses, he will want to wear them as it helps him see so much better!

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  4. Hi Tanya, I definitely agree with Corrie – I would call his eye doctor and ask especially about seeing double. When kids see double, they will often suppress the vision from one eye which can lead to amblyopia. I do know that prescriptions can take a while to get used to – I remember one change for myself where for 2 days things that I knew were straight looked curved.

    I’m going to post your question on the main page and ask if anyone else with nearsighted kids has run in to this.

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  5. I just stumbled onto this website and love it. We found out that our 18 month old daughter needs glasses and patching. I’m completely overwhelmed, worried, and of course, blaming myself. It was great to read the starting out section and advice from others, I feel slightly more at ease. I’m sure that I will continue to refer to this website in the next several months.

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    • Welcome Courtney – sounds like you are an awesome parent and your daughter is SUPER lucky to have you =) Hang in there and keep us updated! Hopefully I’ll get the starting out patching page done soon!

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  6. My son (aged 5) has just been told he needs glasses. He was excited initially and tried on some with superman decorations on the wings, but then in the car on the way home asked – What if people laugh at me with glasses on. I told him if they did, it would only be because they were jealous and wished they had them too. However, it struck a chord with me. I remember distinctly the day I got my glasses. I was 5 too. They arrived in a cardboard package. Little pink National Health ones with wire bits for around the ears. My parents marvelled at how lovely I was and I felt like the bees knees… and then I walked into the class to taunts of “Specky four eyes! Ha Ha” and I was heartbroken. I avoid wearing glasses when I can myself because I feel very unattractive in them and have a real thing about them after growing up with horrible glasses until I was 16. I am within the visual limit to drive without glasses – just – so I avoid them. Trying hard to protect my son from a similar experience. I’m worried about how he will adjust. Children can be very cruel….

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  7. Here is our unraveling story. We have a 4 year old who we just found out is very farsighted. The doctor also says she has slight lazy eye in both eyes. So I have since scheduled an appt with a pediatric opthamalogist but cant get in until September. So for now we are left with a +8.25 both eyes prescription for her first pair of glasses. (which are not in yet) The doctor did say the glasses will make everything very blurry until she gets used to them and gave me drops to put in to dialate her eyes if she wont wear them. I am just wondering if this sounds at all familiar to anyone here. Is this common? It sounds extreme to throw these glasses on her that are so strong, but I am so ignorant to glasses and eyes that I thought I could get some words of advise here. I just want to be sure I am doing the right thing to help her.

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    • Welcome Megs, That is a strong farsighted prescription, though I know there are many parents on here whose children have stronger prescriptions. The difficulty with farsighted prescriptions is that children can use their accommodative reflex to help them focus and overcome their farsightedness. That’s why so many of us parents (myself included) never had any idea their child was farsighted. This also means that if they’ve been using that to focus a lot, it can be hard for them to relax their eye muscles and let their glasses do the work for them. But I do know a lot of kids who took to their strong prescription glasses right away, so don’t be too discouraged. The dilating drops will stop your daughter from being able to use her accommodative reflex, which is why it is sometimes used to help introduce farsighted children to glasses. If she absolutely refuses the glasses, then the drops can make it so that she does see much better with her glasses. But the drops are not always easy, they sting, and I would try introducing the glasses without them for a week or so first. It will probably take her a while to get used to those glasses in any case, but if she needs that strong of a prescription, then it’s good that she’ll have those glasses now rather than waiting until September.

      I think it’s really too bad that you’ll need to wait so long to see a pediatric ophthalmologist, though! How frustrating! Will you have a follow-up appointment with the doctor that prescribed your daughter’s glasses?

      Best of luck to you and please keep us updated on how things are going!

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  8. Already I feel better. Thats so much for giving me confidence that this is a normal approach and information so I better understand whats happening with her eyes. We do have a follow up appt with her doctor after she has worn the glasses for 3 weeks. Thanks again and I will update on whats happening, and with future questions which I am certain will come up!

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    • I love our pediatric opthamologist, but they are hard to get into too. I would call them every morning and ask if they have had a cancelation for that day. I am always upbeat, cheerful and insistant to see the doctor as soon as possible. Hopefully you will be able to see a specialist sooner than later. My neighbor had the same issue with the office and did this. She was origionally given an appointment 6 months away, but ended up having her girls seen in just a few weeks.

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  9. My little girl is 9m old and we knew that she had a lazy eye a borth i seen it right away!anyway her DR. sent her to a P.O so he told her dad and i that she needed glasses she in 50+ in both and f.s and she has a lazy eye in one ! so now we got her glasses but i cant get her to keep them on at all not even for a min she pulls them off then they hurt her nose and then all she will do is cry ! so can any one HELP ME !

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    • Hi Crystal, and welcome! How long has she had the glasses? There are some stories of babies taking to their glasses right away, but most of them take a few weeks to even a month to get used to them. Can you get her to the glasses shop to just make sure that they’re adjusted correctly? She won’t wear them if they hurt, so that’s probably the first thing I’d check. After that, it’s really a matter of patience and staying positive (even if you want to scream, and believe me, when we started Zoe on her glasses, there were days I wanted to scream). Just be sure you’re putting them on her face with a smile on your face, tell her she looks great, and then try whatever you can to distract her. You’ll probably have to repeat that many times. It just takes time until they get used to their glasses and will wear them.

      Good luck and keep us updated on how things go!

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      • she has only had them about 2 1/2 weeks ! but she had her kidney taken out a week ago ! i think they hurt her i have a hard time geting them on her face and on her ears! we take her to the P/O on the 8th so i hope we can get somthing done with her then i seen some frames on here that i realy like the miraflex ones the good thing is my eye place has them .

        thanks and i will !

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      • Oh goodness, that’s just a lot for her to have gone through in such a short time – I can definitely imagine that it might take her more time to settle into the glasses.

        I’m glad you have another appointment soon, I’d definitely ask about whether they can adjust the frames to hurt her less. You might even try taking her in earlier for adjustments if you have the time. Are her glasses leaving any marks? Zoe’s were leaving dark marks on her nose, I thought it meant we’d need new glasses (hers were 1 1/2 years old), but they were able to adjust them to fit better.

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      • i will look in to all that when we go to the appointment ! yes she has alot ing on with her she has been sick since b4 i had her and it just keeps adding up its like every time we go to the doctor they are sending me to a new one !

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      • ANN I JUST WANT TO THANK YOU EMILY HAS HAD HER GLASSES ON ABOUT 15 MIN NOW AND DNT EVEN CARE THANKS FOR ALL YOUR HELP

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      • she had them on for about 2 hours she did so good! i was so happy still am im going to try again here in a little to get her to keep them on again!

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  10. Hi! I have a question…
    What do you do for your swimming lessons? My little one is glasses free for 40 minutes, but it really bugs me because she goes cross-eyed to accommodate for her farsightedness (+4 both eyes). She’s only 19 months old.

    Do any of you have prescription goggles for your little ones? Or do you just let them wear their goggles in?

    She’s only had glasses for a week and a half, and it only took her two days to get used to them. Now she cries when we take them off, and says “better” when we put them on. We’re so relieved! Now it seems strange to see her without them!

    I don’t want to get prescription goggles until we know for certain whether the prescription is going to change.

    Personally I have nothing against her wearing her glasses in once a week for 30 minutes. They only go under the water a few times during the lesson. Do you think the glasses would rust?

    Thanks,
    Jade.
    PS: Loved this site for it’s advice and other articles, and Little Chiara loves looking at the children in glasses… every time I walk past the computer she says “glasses, glasses!!!” and wants me to open the gallery! So cute. She takes delight in looking at others with glasses. It warms my heart.

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    • Thanks Jade! My daughter goes without glasses for her swim lessons. It bothers me to see her cross her eyes, too, but she doesn’t seem to have trouble seeing, and like you, I didn’t want to buy prescription goggles until her prescription settled. I do know a lot of other parents here have ordered prescription goggles, and I think if the prescription is off a little, it’s probably not too much of a big deal. There is a post about goggles if you are interested in links to places where you can order some: http://littlefoureyes.com/2009/07/02/reader-question-prescription-swim-goggles/

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  11. Hi, i’m new to this site and just wondered if anyone one had any knowledge they could share with me.
    My daughter is 9 months old and has been prescribed her first set of glasses her sister was 19 months before she got hers. She has no lazy eye or squint but eye drop test gave her a prescription of right +2.0 and left +3.0. The opthamologist said this wasnt quite as high as needed but would start her off.
    Has anyone else had a similar expeience and know if having glasses so young helps or if its worth waiting until they are older?
    Many thanks Bev

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  12. My little girl will be 2 here in December. A year ago I took her in for an eye exam after her pediatrician mentioned strabismus. Turned out she did not have strabismus, but she was nearsighted; however, she was not prescribed any glasses. We went in today for a follow up appointment, and it was a disaster. My daughter fought the doctors incredibly hard, and they concluded that her nearsightedness had gotten better. I would like to believe this is true, but from my understanding myopia does not typcially get better on its own. I have also noticed in the recent months that she simpily cannot always make out what common, familar objects are that are at a distant. Even at the office today she was insisting a fishy was on a shelf on the wall, which was not there, and I had to pick her up and take her closer so she could “see” for herself no fish was up there. Should I get a second opinion, and if so, how can I get her to be calmer when they go to check her eyes so a good exam can be done?

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    • Oh, from your description, I would recommend a second opinion, especially if you feel that she’s not seeing as well as she should be. When you make the appointment, ask what testes they’ll do and talk to your daughter about what’s coming up. We found that playing shape matching games helped a lot at that age since our doctor had her look at a chart with different shapes and then either name the shape or point to its match on a board. I’m guessing they’ll also do dilating drops, which are what my daughter really hates. You could pretend to give a doll or animal eye drops leading up to the exam, though my sense is that nothing makes eye drops easier.

      Good luck and let us know how it goes!

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  13. Took my four year old daughter to the eye doctor last week and he diagnosed her with being really farsighted. He sent her a prescription of +4 in both eyes. The doctor told me that he was putting her in 60% of the prescription so her real prescription was going to be +6. I took her to a second opinion and that doctor said that her true prescription is going to be +10.5 and that he would start her at an +8. I don’t understand how the diagnosis can be sooooo different. This doctor said that with that prescription we should start considering contact lenses in the near near future. I made an appointment with another doctor for a third opinion because I just don’t know how both of those prescriptions are so different. Can anyone tell me how thick glasses with a prescription of +10.5 are? I’m just concerened how the other kids are going to treat her now. I guess I’m just scared and concerned for her.

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  14. My son was born with caracts and had to have surgery at 2 months old. He is know 18 months old and is needing new contacts and glasses to see close up and far away. He will need bifocals beside the contacts. Does anybody else have to do the same?

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  15. So I just found out that my 2 1/2 year old daughter is farsighted and has astigmistim. She has a prescription of +4.00, I just ordered her glasses yesterday and liked how cute she looked in the frames but now I’m worried that the lenses will magnify her eyes, I did get the thinner lenses that get thinner on the edges. Does anyone hav a child with a similar prescription, how did their eyes look with glasses? Thanks for any advice

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  16. My daughter was just diagnosed with amblyopia in her left eye. Glasses and patching for 2 hours a day is the plan… her left eye is +4.50 , her right eye just says PL.

    My huge concern is that one eye is going to look magnified and one eye isn’t. That she will look funny or weird since they don’t match. Can anyone calm my fears? PICTURES would be great!! : )

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  17. what do you say to your 5 year old when he asks why he needs to wear glasses? (he just had his first visit to the opthamologist and is farsighted.)

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    • That’s a great question! I’ve looked and not found much that really explains glasses at that age level. I’m working on a series of posts for kids right now.

      Sent from my iPhone

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  18. I’d be curious to see what you come up with. I wanted to make my response to him simple, positive and something he can understand (my husband and I do not wear glasses – so we can’t compare it to ourselves). And it’s tough because he thinks he can see just fine. He’s excited now, but we pick up his frames in a few days I want to be prepared for when reality strikes! Thanks!

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  19. Our oldest children are 19 and 15, the youngest is 6. The oldest two wear contacts full time and have since they were 9 and 7 respectively. I’ve watched the six year old take his eye test three times at the pediatrician and get no better than 20/40 and she recommends every time to take him to an optometrist because he needs glasses. But we’ve had his eyes tested twice at the family optometrist and every time she says he doesn’t need glasses. I don’t know who to believe. If he needs glasses I will get them for him in a minute, but one doctor says yes and the other says no. I don’t know who to trust. Any ideas?

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    • Oh, it’s so hard when doctors disagree! Can you get a second opinion from a different optometrist? Has your son complained of difficulties seeing?

      Good luck, I’d love to hear what you discover.

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  20. We discussed it last night and we decided to get another opinion. A co-worker of mine recommended her kids’ optometrist to me. I made an appointment for him to have his eyes checked by this doctor on Saturday. Glasses or no glasses, I’m excited to find some form of resolution for my son’s eyes!!!

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    • I think that’s wise, especially getting a referral for another eye doctor that you know works with kids. Here’s hoping for some clear (no pun intended) answers!

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      • I should have seen this coming. My wife, in true “mom” fashion decided they could do better than the Saturday appointment I made so she called and “they just happened to find” an opening this afternoon at 4:30. Do you mind if I update you on what we find out later today?

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  21. So what’s happening is his eyes work better together than apart, which I don’t understand, but the doctor says isn’t uncommon. When they tested his eyes together he could see the 20/30 line, which the doctor says is acceptible at his age but normally just worth monitoring every 6 to 12 months. But individually his eyes test at 20/60 and 20/70 which the doctor says means he needs to start wearing glasses. He wants to train my son’s brain to see things individually through each eye and not have them depend on each other so much and he says the glasses will do that. He picked out some frames at the office and they will be in in the next week or so. I feel bad that he may have struggled for so long and we didn’t correct him soon enough, but I’m glad he’ll be getting the help he needs and for the rest of his life he’ll be able to see well. To borrow from your website’s name, my little man is now a little four eyes!!!

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    • Very interesting. Thanks for the update, I’m glad you got the second opinion. It sounds like your son was seeing all right with both eyes, so it makes sense that it would have been hard to catch.

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      • Just in case you’re interested he received his new glasses last Friday and spent the whole weekend talking about them. He’s reading words off the television from the kitchen which he never did before and he’s noticing more details on things, such as the stubbornly unremovable ketchup stain on his favorite retro shirt that has been on there for more than a year. I can’t tell you what a relief it is for us to look at our little boy with his glasses on and know he’s getting the help he needs. Though the guilt of not doing it sooner stings, at least we know he’s on the right track from now on.

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      • It’s been just over a year since he started wearing glasses and our son is doing beautifully. He just had his one year follow up eye appointment and it turns out the glasses are having the desired effect. His eyes tested 20/60 together this time, which is what the optometrist said she was hoping would happen. She changed his prescription to something a little stronger, which she also said is something she hoped would happen, as his eyes are now functioning more independently and are now more relaxed. He’s gained so much in confidence and dexterity. Him getting glasses is one of the best things ever to happen to him.

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      • I’m sorry to keep bugging you, but at the latest appointment his prescription made a large jump from OD -4.00 and OS -4.50 to -5.50 and -6.25 respectively, which is stronger than anyone’s in my family, and we all wear correction. The doctor assured us that, though his vision is changing quickly, this is not uncommon with kids his age. But that it’s imperative we have him tested every six months so we can keep his prescription updated as his eyes change. His corrected vision is fantastic with the new lenses, but it’s still something we’re concerned about. Do you have any experience in this area?

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  22. My 2 y/o girl was recently diagnosed as farsighted. She was originally diagnosed as +9.50 in both eyes. After the first appointment I started looking around and found your website with multiple recommendations to get second opinions, which we did. The second opinion gave us an entirely different prescription, +7.00. We decided to get a third opinion to see if they would concur with the others and got a third prescription, +8.50. While all agree she is farsighted, none of them agree on how much correction she needs. The first optometrist was the most reassuring and explained everything better than the second optometrist or the third doctor, who is an ophthalmologist, so we feel like his is the correct diagnosis. We explained to the ophthalmologist the previous diagnoses and he essentially told us that he is a specialist and we should only pay attention to his diagnosis. While he is right that he is a specialist, we don’t feel like he had our daughter’s best interests at heart. What do you think we should do?

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    • In this case, I would say that the eye doctors do agree on the main diagnosis – that she’s farsighted. The difference is in how much of that farsightedness they want to correct. Some doctors prefer to start on the low side and then increase the prescription, others will start with the higher prescription right away. In this case, if the issue is refractive error, then either an optometrist or ophthalmologist would be an appropriate specialist — ophthalmologists can perform eye surgery, but that’s not something you’re looking at right now. I think that if you feel like the first eye doctor really understood your daughter and did a good job working with you, then I’d go with that doctor. I would probably recommend letting them know that you sought second opinions and hear their thoughts on the different prescriptions.

      Best of luck

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      • We took her back to the eye doctor this weekend. He was reassuring and said he understood entirely why we went to see other doctors. He knew we were upset when we found out she needed glasses but he promised he will treat her eyes just like he would treat his child’s. We ordered two pair of glasses. He told us to be prepared for her lenses to be thick and for her eyes to appear a bit larger than they do, but that it’s simply due to the amount of correction her eyes need. He also promised us she will be seeing things she hasn’t seen before, which is very exciting for us. Did you ever experience the appearance change he spoke of? I know I won’t see her any differently, but I’m so happy she’ll be able to see me differently for the first time!

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      • It’s been six months now and the difference has been amazing. We just took her back for her second visit and her prescription changed just a little, so we had new lenses put into her primary frames. When she put them on the first time she touched my face and smiled widely. She told me how much different things we. She called it ‘magic’. I cried, overjoyed at her improvement. She’s taken to them so well and loves wearing them. The first time I saw her lenses I couldn’t believe how long she’d gone without them. I’ve tried forgiving myself for not noticing and making her struggle for so long. But more than anything, I’m just happy my sweet girl can see. Thank you for your support and advice. Your website has been invaluable to me.

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