“Why he doesn’t wear glasses?”

Zoe’s 3 and well into the “why” stage of life.  “Why it’s called ‘breakfast’?”  “Why it is snowing?”  “Why I can’t wear a dress and a skirt at the same time?” And recently, “why he (or she) doesn’t wear glasses?” (Her word order for asking questions isn’t quite right, but I find it kind of charming.)

"why?"

Sometimes it seems like the only question she hasn’t asked yet is “why do I wear glasses?”  I think that starting glasses at 14 months, plus having family who wear glasses, it just hasn’t ever occurred to her that there was even a possibility that she wouldn’t wear glasses.  And I’ll be the first to say that we’re very lucky in this regard, and I am not complaining about that.

But I’m still struggling with answering why someone else doesn’t wear glasses.  I often find myself using analogies when I try to explain things to her, but I haven’t found a good one to explain glasses.  I don’t like telling her that other people have “better” eyes, even if that is essentially what’s going on, because she has the most beautiful grey-green-blue eyes I’ve ever seen.  I can’t think of any eyes that are better.

I end up trying to explain that other people don’t need glasses to help them see, but that never seems to quite satisfy her.  Then again, she’s 3, and none of my answers to her “why” questions seem quite good enough.  Have you explained glasses to your child?  Any explanations that seemed to work especially well?

6 responses to ““Why he doesn’t wear glasses?”

  1. We got a picture of Aubrie by a sign that says the average 4 year old asks 437 questions a day – so true!

    Aubrie has never asked why someone else doesn’t wear glasses because no one in our family wears glasses at all. Instead we get they why do I wear glasses question. We’re just straight forward with her and tell her that they help her to see, and that they are a part of what makes her special. It’s easier to explain now that she’s 4 because she accepts the answer one time. So far she thinks glasses are the greatest thing ever, and compared to what my friends wore in the 80’s they are a huge improvement!

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  2. We don’t get the questions too often though when we do we’re just as matter of fact about it as we can be, and explain that sometimes people just need a little bit of help.

    With the patch..that it helps make his eye a little bit stronger every day.

    Oftentimes, N will pull the patch off and say ‘see my eye is getting stronger !!’

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  3. Elly asks a million questions about glasses. When we went to visit Santa… the two of them discussed glasses. Santa wore bifocals, but said he and his wife use trifocals. Elly’s recent one is why can mommy take her glasses off since I only need them for driving. We have talked about how peoples eyes are all different and some need help for seeing far away, other people up close, and some don’t need the help of glasses at all.

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  4. Maybe she would accept “they don’t have any glasses, yet. You’re lucky you have beautiful ones now!” Since almost everyone ends up with some kind of glasses.

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  5. Bennett’s surrounded by people wearing glasses and it’s our older two children asking why they don’t get to wear glasses. We said maybe when they are older they will and they eagerly ask every doctor visit if they need glasses yet. 🙂 Now the patch Bennett does not like but he’s allowed to play a computer game when he puts his patch on and that seems to be a good consolation.

    So that’s been our answer as to why someone doesn’t wear glasses, “They don’t get to, not everyone gets to have cute glasses like you.” And yes, that’s kind of backfired because my three year old demanded glasses so we took the lenses out of an old prescription of Bennett’s and let her have them for dress up.

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  6. We get both from our 4 year old.
    Why do I wear glasses? (Your glasses help you see better.) Why? (The special lenses are help make things just the right size for you to see the best you can. No pair of glasses is the same even if they look like it.) <— This usually is enough, although they could be the same.
    Why doesn't X wear glasses? (Her eyes work differently from yours. She sees better without them. YOu see better with them.) <— Then I usually say something like "Man, glasses are so cool. No one else in your class gets to wear cool diamond glasses every day like you do. ANd no one else gets to wear sunglasses at recess, but you get to wear them!" (She has transitions.)

    She also patches and it was never much of an issue until recently. Now she resists and there is very little we can do, but it doesn't help that GROWN adults in the store ask "Whats wrong with her eye?" Ugh!

    My 12 month old just had her first visit today and it appears she is following in big sissy's footsteps. Can't wait to see how she will adjust to wearing them!

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