Your stories: dealing with triplets when one of them wears glasses

This story came in from Jennifer. -Ann Z

When I found out Bo has Accommodative Esotropia and would have to wear glasses, I was not concerned about how he would handle it.  I was concerned about how his brother and sister would handle it.  I have Triplets.  When Bo got glasses they were a little over 1.5 years old (they are currently 2.5 years old).  In August Bo will be wearing glasses for a year.  I can not even begin to count the number of frames he has had.  Just this week two pairs have been broken.  JUST THIS WEEK!  His glasses were broke over the weekend and he had an eye dr appointment on Wed.  So, I dropped his VERY broken glasses off. Since they were unfixable they had to order new frames.  Then, this morning I had to drive the hour back to the eye glass place to drop off his other pair and of course they are beyond fixable and another set of frames is being ordered.  He now wears a pair that the eye glass manager was nice enough to make us for free, but since those too are broke, they are ducktaped, holding the arm in place.  We live in a very small town and have to travel an hour one way to the eye dr and eyeglass place.

Bo, Anna, and Alex. Bo wears glasses for accommodative esotropia.

Having 3 toddlers the same age with one having something that the other 2 do not, is a major adjustment and hassle.  They have always had the same things and gotten the same things.  If one gets something, the other 2 get the same thing.  They always go everywhere together (I am a SAHM with no help and my husband does not get home until 6pm).  So, when Bo got glasses he did not want them and Anna and Alex did.  It is a constant battle.  I must ask a million times a day “where are you glasses?” and “where are Bo’s glasses?”  I will found them in a bed tangled up with sheets, or at the bottom of the basement stairs or stuffed somewhere.  MOST of the time whichever one hid or threw them will find them and bring them back to me.  BUT, times like this week I leave the room for less then 5 minutes (or even just turn my back) and I find them in pieces, looking like they have been run over by a truck.  Two pairs have ended up like that just this week.  Bo is great about putting them on and taking them off and handing them to me.  They all know his glasses is my button to push to get me upset.  If Anna or Alex get mad and Bo is anywhere near them, they sling his glasses off his face.  Anna and Alex also know this is the way to pick on Bo.  He has always been the quite one and the one to be picked on.  And taking his glasses is how they pick on him.

And then when I am told Bo will have to wear a patch an hour day my first thought was “great, stick a big sticker on his face.  Something else for the other 2 to be jealous over”.  We have tried everything from giving Anna and Alex play glasses and stickers, but nothing works.  I can’t turn my back or leave the room for a minute without worrying about his glasses.  I don’t want to have to take his glasses off everytime I leave the room.  Nor do I want to have to drag him with me.

We have been luckly enough to have found a wonderful group of people working at VisionWorks.   We had no vision insurance when Bo first got glasses.  The glasses at the eye dr were going to run about $300.  When all was said and done (taxes, warranty, special lenses, scratch resistant–yeah right!) I got 2 pairs of glasses at VisionWorks for $180.  They have been great, not making us pay for replacement frames and even ordering him an extra pair for free.  Like I said before, I can not even begin to count the number of frames we have been through.  His prescription is due to change in August and I am looking for sturdier glasses.  The ones at the eye dr can be twisted and rolled up into a ball and they bounce back in place.  My thought is to get those on the insurance and then get a replacement pair (or two) at VisionWorks.  I am very open to thoughts and suggestions on sturdier glasses!

It is an ongoing battle and I can only hope that it gets better as they get older. That one day (sooner than later) Anna and Alex will learn to leave Bo’s glasses alone and that Bo will learn not to let them take them off.  I know I have probably made my children sound like horrible monsters, but I promise they are not (only when it comes to the glasses)!

Children’s Eye Foundation photo contest

It is time again for the Children’s Eye Foundation’s “I Care for Eyecare” photo contest.   Children’s Eye Foundation is the foundation of the American Association for Pediatric Ophthalmology and Strabismus, their aim is to ensure that all children receive proper eye care, and to encourage physicians to enter the field of pediatric ophthalmology.  Each year, they run a contest to get submissions for a calendar that they sell as a fundraiser.  Last year was the first year they asked for photos, and anyone who was reading at that time probably remembers that we tried to get as many of our little four eyes into the contest, and into the calendar (you can see the submissions from our readers here – three of those submissions ended up in the 2010 calendar).

This year’s theme is “love at first sight,” which they say could include images that “portray the love a between a baby and parent or family or the love found via a child’s first vision or life experience.”  That’s a pretty open category, and I would really encourage all of you to consider submitting a picture of your child.  I know from the photo gallery (which I desperately need to update) and from the facebook group, that we have some incredibly photogenic children and talented photographers, and I firmly believe that the calendar from the Children’s Eye Foundation should have many pictures of beautiful children who have directly benefited from great eye care.   The top 12 vote-getters will win a digital camera, and a panel of judges will choose 12 photos from the submissions to include in the 2011 calendar.

Like last year, let me know either in the comments or in an email (ann@shinypebble.com) if you’ve submitted a photo and the page and title of the photo.  I’ll post the pictures and links to vote for each of them.  Even if you don’t submit a photo, I’d love if you stopped by and voted for one or more of our photos.  At the moment, it looks like you can only vote for one photo a day.  I’ll keep this page updated and link to it from the sidebar of the blog so you can easily get to it and see new entries and vote.

This year they’ve changed some of the rules, probably for the better:

  • Entries can only receive one vote from the same person in a 24-hour period of time. If it is determined that an entry is receiving multiple votes from the same IP address within a 24-hour period of time, the entry will be subject to removal without notice.
  • People who won cameras in last year’s contest can still enter to have their photo included in the calendar, but they will not be eligible to win a camera.  People who submitted photos that were included in the calendar can still enter, and can still win.
  • Entries are subject to removal at any time without notice.
  • Each family is allowed one submission.
  • You can see the full list of rules here.
  • Voting runs until Oct. 1.

Photos submitted by Little Four Eyes readers (click on the picture to get to the voting page):

I love cupcakes!
Love my little world
Love from first sight
Mother's day kisses
Big sister love
Big sister love
Like dad, like daughter
Brotherly love - Sofie and her brother Aiden
Learning about my world and loving it
Aubrie - The love of dance

Share

Share

Questions for parents of children with visual impairments

I just got this request on the facebook group, and wanted to pass it along to parents of children with visual impairments (that is, children whose vision issues are non-correctable).

My name is Chloe and I am a student Social worker doing a research placement looking at children with visual impairments.

I was wondering if anyone would mind answering a few questions. The study is completely confidential and the aim is to improve social services for children with a visual impairment.

Thank you

Click the Read More link for the questions.

Continue reading “Questions for parents of children with visual impairments”

When to take your child in to get their glasses adjusted

After my last post about our latest trip to the glasses shop to get all of  Zoe’s glasses adjusted, Darlene left a comment asking for more information about my comment that Zoe’s blue glasses were leaving red marks on her nose.  She wondered if red marks were always an indication of a bad fit, and whether the marks were gone now that those frames have been adjusted.  I figured I’d write a new post, since knowing when to take Zoe’s glasses in to get them adjusted is something I still struggle with.

To answer Darlene’s questions, I turned to Danielle Cruss (who goes by Miss Danielle on her website).  She is a Master-Certified Optician, who specializes in fitting and dispensing glasses for children.  She has a website that’s chock full of great information on children’s glasses, A Child’s Eyes.  Her website is listed on my page of resources for parents, but it’s such a good website, I didn’t think it would hurt to bring it up again.

One of the pages on A Child’s Eyes focuses specifically on the importance of getting glasses to fit correctly for a child.  The last three paragraphs talk about signs that you should bring your child’s glasses in for adjustments.  Specifically, marks on the side of their faces, and marks on the backs of their ears.  Marks on the side of their faces need quick attention (adjustments or new frames) as they can indicate that the frames are interfering with your child’s normal head growth.

I also interviewed Miss Danielle a year ago, and asked her for more information about signs that you child’s glasses aren’t fitting correctly, and here’s what she said:

If you notice any of the following you should stop by and have your child’s glasses adjusted:

  • glasses that slip down,
  • marks on the nose that are uneven or not symmetrical on either side of the nose,
  • marks on the nose that don’t go away after about 5 minutes,
  • glasses that are crooked on their face,
  • any marks behind the ears.
  • For the younger ones, if you notice any behavior changes, i.e.: doesn’t want to wear them, picking at their ears or rubbing their eyes, and watery eyes. [I can absolutely validate this one!  A while back, I noticed Zoe all of a sudden stopped wearing her glasses.  Turns out they were really crooked, and really messing up her vision – Ann Z]

The full interview is here, and is also worth a read if you missed it the first time around.  Miss Danielle really shared a ton of fantastic information.  I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I’d forgotten that I’d asked her about this in the interview until I went back to re-read it tonight.

I can answer Darlene’s last question all by myself – this evening I checked Zoe’s nose after she’d worn her blue glasses all day.  There were slight indentations on her nose, but no more red marks.   Hooray!

New patches – Make your own, Elly style

There are benefits to being awake nursing a baby at 3:00 in the morning, one of which that I have time to think by myself (well, without a chatty 3 year old)  This is the patch that I came up the other night / morning.  It is light weight, covers 98% of all light, easy to make and inexpensive.   All you need is the pattern, some craft foam, scotch tape, a needle and thread.  Would anyone be interested if I made you a tutorial?

Share

marathon glasses adjustment

I should have taken Zoe in to get her glasses adjusted a long time ago.  Her blue glasses have been leaving red marks on her nose for quite a while now, but she wasn’t complaining about it.  Her red glasses have been looking crooked for almost as long, but again, she wasn’t really complaining.  Then last weekend, she refused to wear her sunglasses, which she normally loves, because they “hurt her eyes.”

Zoe's crooked glasses - they were a little high on the right side and didn't sit square on her nose. (ok, I'll admit, I mostly just wanted to post this picture because I like it)

So we finally got in on Friday with all three pairs in tow.  I know from experience that middle of the day on a weekday tends to be pretty quiet, so that’s when we went and there was only one other mother-daughter pair there (coincidentally, they were picking up the same frames as Zoe has, but in different colors.  We complimented them on their good taste).  The guy who was working laughed as I pulled glasses case after glasses case out of my purse, but he was happy to do the adjustments.  I had been a bit worried about bringing in the sunglasses, since those didn’t come from the store, but I explained that we got them elsewhere, and he was fine doing the adjustments on those as well.

Both the blue pair and the red pair were too tight, and the red pair was crooked as well.  The optician said she must have had a growth spurt.  Lesson learned:  If she’s getting red spots on her nose, we need to get her in for an adjustment.  Happily, we learned that they could be adjusted to still fit for a good long while. We’d been worried that Zoe was going to need new frames again, but we’re good with these for a while still.  The sunglasses were too loose, but they’re fitting well now, too, and Zoe wore them with no complaint the last two days.

Zoe happily told everyone she saw on Friday and Saturday about getting her glasses adjusted, and that she got stickers from the glasses shop as well.  I worry that she’ll one day put two and two together and realize that if she bends her glasses, she’ll get to go to the shop for glasses adjustments and a sticker.

The Specs Are In…

So here she is with her new glasses.. We are totally loving her cute new look, and it’s been fun to show her off to friends and family. At the office when she put them on the Optometrist said “Look outside Birdi..” and she did. I choked up a bit. She just took it in. Then we tried some other frames on (discounted frames to have a backup pair made) and she eagerly looked around and was disappointed to see (or not see) that everything looked the same. She wasn’t able to wear them for an hour while the ear loops dried, so I put them on her as she climbed out of the car. She looked around the garage and said “It’s SO CLEAN!!” I couldn’t help but laugh. She ran around touching things saying “This is CLEAN! That is CLEAN!” and then she trotted over to the garage door which was covered in smudges and said “Whoah… that door is NOT clean!”

As the day wore on, she did want them off as they did start to bother her eyes. I gave her some tylenol and she seemed to relax after that. As of this morning she is happy as a clam. A few things I do have concerns about now that she has her sassy new specs. First of all, her pupils really seem to dialate when she is  wearing them. Why is that? Also, she has mentioned seeing a rainbow as they come off. I assume she is seeing some prisms. They go away, but is this something to be concerned about? Ah, and as I post this she has approached me with a bare face. Thus begins the phrase that will be heard a plenty in this abode….

Birdi! Where are your glasses?!

I’m Birdi’s Mom.. It’s What I Do.

Well if I’m going to be completely honest, I’m Diane, Amy, Birdi and Frank’s mom. They are each a bit more than two years apart, and I may be one of the older 30-year-olds that I know. Birdi is not my first child to need glasses, but she’s the youngest of the crew so far, and has a very strong prescription. So here’s how our story begins.

Spring is upon us, and Birdi is enrolling in her second year of preschool. As we ready our paperwork, we realize that she is a bit overdue for her four year checkup. I make an appointment, and wrestle my 20 month old son under one arm, while holding Birdi’s little hand with my own. At the doctor’s office, she obediently and cheerfully hops on the scale, a perfect 30 pounds. Then it’s over to the wall to be measured. She’s a peanut just a hair over three feet. The nurse asks if I think she could handle the vision test, which is merely a poster with simple black and white pictures. The nurse positions Birdi and I at a predetermined distance from the wall.

“Okay Birdi, what’s this a picture of?”

Birdi fidgets, rubs her eyes and looks shyly to me.

“I don’t know.”

I press her a little…

“Birdi, you know what that is! You just had one of your own at your party not long ago.”

She continues to fidget and won’t look up. The nurse walks up to us and takes Birdi’s hand, then steps Birdi forward about 5 feet.

“A birthday cake!” yelps Birdi as the nurse points at the top picture.

Oh dear.

In the exam room, the doctor suggests we follow up at the eye care place of our choice. There is a chain place that I go to and figure that will be enough to see if she really has a need for correction, or just has a short attention span. We are actually able to get her in that same afternoon.

Now, I walked into that office with a resolve to not be “sold” glasses. I have come to question the integrity of some chains, and figured that if she only needed minor correction, we might do some homework before buying a pair of glasses that will be ready in an hour. So we step into the dim room, Birdi starts her exam. About 15-20 minutes later, the optometrists takes off his own glasses to rub his eyes and say

“I would like to send Birdi to a pediatric specialist.”

It turns out, that by his best measurements, Birdi has a prescription of  +7.5 in one eye and+7.0 in the other.  He explains that this is a very strong Rx for a kidlet, and wants someone who works very closely with children to take a better measurement. He gives me a phone number and sends us on our way.

Oh, and of course he reminds me that I am welcome to bring the Rx back and they can fill it for us. I snickered. I couldn’t help it.

So I go home a bit shell shocked. I mean, she can see right? She does sit directly in front of the TV, but what kid doesn’t? I find myself quizzing her with a black and white picture of her and Chuck E. Cheese from her birthday. I turn it sideways so that instead of side by side, she and the resin figure are alternately on the top or bottom of the picture. She’s excited about the game until she can’t see it anymore, and it should be clear as day. Suddenly things are making sense.

Birdi is pushy to be in front, and she has a short attention span. She loves to hear a bedtime story, but will fidget as soon as the book is out of her hands. What I think was happening, is that she loses interest the minute the object she is to be focusing on grows blurry.

So our next stop was the specialist. We made an appointment with the only pediatric ophthalmology office in our area. The drive is just shy of an hour, but the office was great. We were seen in a timely manner. The verdict: both eyes are around +5.5.  He informed me that though this was a pretty big prescription, it was not horrible. My biggest question of course is how she sees now. He explained it this way..

Small children have a remarkable ability to accommodate for vision shortcomings. Birdi is able to see things, but it takes a lot of work. Basically she focuses on something (say a flower) and takes in the information about it (it’s yellow with petals) and then her eyes relax again. Her brain has all the info it needs and moves on. Once she gets her glasses, though she will recognize things the way they always were, I might notice her staring, because now there is no stress when trying to take in more details. It made sense to me, and I am very eager for her to get her new specs.

The doctor decided that we would start with a Rx of +4.5 in both eyes, and see how that affected her sight over the next few months. He handed me our prescription and suggested we just use the optometry shop right there. We ordered her new glasses to the tune of over $300, and still do not have them. I called after 10 days had passed, and it turns out that her glasses had come in, but were unreasonably thick and heavy, so he sent them back to have them remade. It has now been 15 days, and I left a message today. I am frustrated and impatient, and have decided to order a backup pair from Zenioptical so that if something should happen to her “good” glasses, she won’t be without for terribly long.

There’s our story thus far. My questions are still many: How will she look? Will she really see things differently? Will she keep them on? Will her eyes look funny? Will her vision seem worse when she takes them off? Will this get better?

I look forward to sharing some pictures of her in her new specs, and I’m thankful for the opportunity to share our story.

Kim

Reader question: child terrified of walking after getting glasses

Melody recently posted this question to the Little Four Eyes facebook group, and I wanted to post it here, too to see if anyone has run into this or has any thoughts or advice for Melody. –Ann Z

Has anybody ever had an issue with their child being terrified to walk after getting glasses? My 2 year old was born premature and had surgery for ROP stage 3 with plus disease. The eye Dr. said the eyes still looked good from the surgery but that my son is severely nearsighted.

The thing is, Nick got around just fine …and rarely fell or bumped into things, but now that he’s wearing his glasses is terrified to walk on the floor….Wood, cement, carpet…it doesn’t matter the texture, he puts his hands down and crouch/creeps around, then gives up and sits and scoots…..Any similar experiences? Thank you!

The New Specs

I recently posted about Grace’s new prescription. She went from +200 to +450. One of the first things mentioned when I went to fill her prescription was how heavy and thick her new lenses would be. I was torn between just trying out the new ones with standard lenses or spending more (DOUBLE!!) for high-index lenses. The concept of high-index lenses is pretty neat – using new plastic lens material that is more efficient thus requiring less material to be used = a thinner and lighter lenses.

So in theory, a great alternative minus the cost… but here’s picture of our darling. You will notice her glasses are really pushing down on her cute little ears. This has always been an issue that seemed more aesthetic than comfort. Recently though it’s gotten worse and she isn’t wanting to wear her glasses. Anyone else experience this and have words of wisdom to share. Any tips would be great.

Your stories – the girl I call Pumpkin

Melissa who blogs at Ask Miss Mommy, sent in this story of her daughter, Grace.  The story was also published on her blog. – Ann Z

Grace at 6 months

This is the story of Pumpkin (aka Grace). My second born, my baby. Kind, calm, happy baby with a fiery will that explodes with force. Grace came into the world fast, in the middle of the night, giving me only 2 hours to get to the hospital. She was immediately absorbed in nursing with a passion that has yet to diminish.

The focus of my little story, though won’t be on her birth but yet her darling eyes. Back in April 2009 (wow a year ago) I posted about Pseudostrabismus. We continue to monitor her eyes after that just to see what would happen. Would the periodic “real” crossing go away or increase? It increased and in January my baby got glasses.

Before we got the glasses though I had some struggles. It was really hard to get the attention of the optometrist (let’s call her Dr. S). I didn’t actually blog about this at the time (or at least I don’t think I did) but my first check in appointment where I voiced my concerns didn’t go well for me. Dr. S didn’t seem to believe me as she couldn’t elicit any crossing. It was frustrating to say the least. I left there feeling frustrated, angry and disappointed. After some thought and time to cool down I called the office and voiced my concern asking to speak with another optometrist.

My wish was granted and we headed back the next week for visit with Dr. M. This time I felt respected, as part of Grace’s team and not just an uninformed bystander. But I was still frustrated. Dr. M couldn’t elicit the crossing either. Finally at the end of the appointment, Grace was sitting on my lap looking at my necklace and she crossed. Never have I been so excited about a somewhat negative thing ever. Dr. M was able to see it in action and validate my concern that, yes it was an issue and true esotropia.

The thing about Grace’s vision is in order to see any crossing she has to be super focused (literally and figuratively) on something close up. Which she frequently is but it’s not the standard way they test vision. The “tests” are done too far away. Grace is also quite young to be given an Accomodative Esotropia diagnosis. It usually appears around 2 years old and she was around 14 months. So I was relieved to have a professional see what I was talking about and note how to test Grace’s vision for the future.

Grace got glasses in January with +200 prescription* (meaning she is farsighted within the mild category). Today we went back for a recheck. Her prescription has increased to +450 (which is now in the high hyperopia range). I’m still a bit confused about the long term outcome for Grace. As far as I know, the best case scenario is to lessen the strain on her eyes (the increase in prescription means her eyes are relaxing so that’s good) and to wean her from glasses as her eyes get stronger and she gets older. I’m trying to stay neutral and just take it one day at a time. We are also patching using a partial occulsion patch for 30 minutes a day.


*Many people post about prescription written as a “+4.5D” number. I was only told a +200 or +450 so that’s what I know. Anyone have words of wisdom on that??

Good News!

Nicholas has normal baby vision and tracks like a 1 year old at 5 months!!!  We still see his eye turn in, but they think it is the skin folds and we will keep checking his eyes every 4 months.  They showed me how to tell by looking at where the light is in his eyes.  They are in the same place in both the left and right eye when they shine a light into his eyes.  Although I do not shine a light into his eyes, I now find myself checking all his pictures.  Yes, the reflection / light spot, is in the same place in every picture.  “Sigh”

Surgery Updates – Back to Patching

Elliana had Bilateral Lateral Rectus Surgery in December to help her staighten her eyes out.  She is really having a hard time physically and emotionally adjusting to the new placement of her eye muscles.  She has been going to OT weekly and we are working on strengthening her vision and sensory integration.  This week, I am making her a body sock and a weighted blanket in hopes of helping her find her sense of place in the world and tone down the sesory overload.  We have tried several different perscriptions and are back to -1,-7.  This is undercorrecting her vision in hopes that her eyes will continue to pull themselves into a straight position and are really working hard.  They are still, however, overcorrected. 

We went in again this morning and they are turning in less than last week with this new perscription, but still turning in.  I understand that we have been telling her brain for so long that she has to work really hard to keep her eyes straight that now we need to teach her brain to relax them a little bit now that we have given her eyes a little help (surgery).  What does this mean? 

Back to patching.  ARGH.  Well, at least we have control over making a difference.  This time, we are patching 8 hours a day for this week, alternating eyes.  Next week, we get to drop down to 4 hours a day, alternating eyes and return to the PO in 2 weeks. 

They handed me a few sticky patches (tan) to get me started and I laughed =)  Elly is so spoiled with patches that she wrinkled her nose at them and said she will use her princess patches.

Keep us in your thoughts and prayers!   Not sure how patching is going to go after a 3 month break.

kids’ first self-portraits with glasses

Shortly after Amomofelly posted about self-portraits of kids in glasses, long-time reader/commenter Annie’s daughter Aubrie (4) came home with a picture she drew at school of herself, wearing glasses.  Annie wrote that it was the first time she’d ever included glasses on a picture of herself.

Aubrie's self-portrait, complete with glasses.

Heidi also posted a link to her son Bennett’s first self-portrait with glasses, drawn just as he turned 4.  You can see his drawing here.

Any others?  I’m happy to post them here, or even start another gallery if we get enough.

How to get eye drops in a 3 year olds eyes

It has been a while since we have had to atropine drop.  Last week, the ophthalmologist had us use the drops in both eyes for 3 days to get the most accurate measurement that they could.  These days were a reminder of why we ended up switching back to patching.

So, you may ask, how in the world do you get the eye drops in.  Well, we line up all the babies who are also getting their eyes dropped (for pretend)  Then we practice on them, telling them it will hurt a little and praising them for holding still.  When I get to the end of the line (Elly)  I hop on, hold her arms down with my knees, pry her eyes open with my left hand and drop with my right.  This is all done swiftly and in less than a second all the screaming, huffing, puffing, kicking, thrashing, you name it, is over.  I then tell her how brave she was and life moves on.

She really hated her glasses for about a week and a half until the atropine wore off, was a bearcat in her disposition, and expressed her distaste in the drops.  The good news is that the reading was the most accurate so far and resulted in a prescription changed.

Yeah eye drops and yeah no more eye drops.